Have I gone too far in monitoring my children’s online activity? | Annalisa Barbieri

At this stage, being a parent is more about negotiation and trust, says Annalisa Barbieri. Sit down as a family and talk about it – make rules together

I have two children, aged nine and 11. We’ve always limited their tech but just before the pandemic, we bought them tablets to give them access to education, entertainment and their friends. Then I became concerned about their increasing use and placed more limits on screen time.

Full disclosure: I am a phone addict. So I introduced a rule where we all put our devices in a box when we aren’t using them (I break this rule most). During the last lockdown, we got my older child a phone. She had already asked for TikTok – her friends all had it, but I refused because it has all sorts of age-inappropriate stuff. However, that was how her friends communicated, so I allowed it as long as it was a private account on my device, so I could monitor it and her messages. She agreed to this reluctantly. I know I need to step back, but how do I do that without neglecting my duties as a parent?

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